The 3 Secret P’s to Energized Leadership

Why a full calendar feels empty

00:00Bill Gallagher: Have you ever had a week when you're completely slammed, but somehow nothing actually moved? Is this one of those weeks? That's not really a time problem. It's a busyness habit problem. My new book, Busy Is Broken, Do Less, Scale More, is all about growing by doing less, not more. Read or listen to a sample chapter over at busyisbroken.com. That's busyisbroken.com. It's also on Amazon and other booksellers.

00:27Bill Gallagher: If your calendar is full but your life feels empty, the fix is three P's: Purpose, Power, and Play. Hey, everybody. I'm Bill Gallagher, Scaling Coach and host of this Scaling Up Business podcast. I bring shows to you every week. So I want to talk to you today about how to have a full calendar or a calendar as full as you want it, right, to a level that fills you, but having satisfaction, having fulfillment and power and enjoyment through all of it. The best leaders that I coach have one thing in common. They don't chase more, they make better choices, right? Purpose is the first of these things. That's your motivation. Power is about the things that you're great at. What are you actually good at? Where are you skilled? And Play is what you enjoy. Those are three very different things. We want to lock them in. Let's talk about me. Share my examples.

Purpose: what you want said at your funeral

01:25Bill Gallagher: So my purpose, my motivation is helping other people. I think about what is it that I really want said about me at the end of my life? Hopefully I live a long successful life, like I hope for each of you. And at the end of it, people will gather around, the people I love, my family, my friends, people I worked with closely. And, you know, there'll be whatever I did in my life and the accomplishments, that's all in the obituary. The eulogy is what I'm interested in here. The motivation, my purpose, right, is spoken by everybody after I'm gone. I really want people, my wife, my kids, grandkids, friends, people I worked with, to gather around. And I want them to say that I was a generous person, that I made a difference. I want them to say I was a contribution. I want them to say I made a difference in their lives and the people around me. So that's what motivates me.

02:26Bill Gallagher: Think about that in my work. Think about that in your work. What do you want said about you after you're gone? Like the line, the sentiment that's most important to you. I met somebody recently and they said, I want to help people succeed. Like success in others matters. So I met somebody else who said they wanted to make the world more beautiful, a better place. People have lots of different things. The thing that most matters at the end of it, think about the people you most love in your life, and what do you want them to say about you? Or you could say, what would I want somebody who loves me to tell somebody else about the kind of person I am? Right? This is actually our life purpose, right? Not how we do the life purpose or what we do with it, but what we really care about. So being remembered as a generous person, as a contribution who helped other people is what I care about. When I help you, an entrepreneur, whether I've met you or not, when I help you do something, and I learn about that, or I see it, that's really fulfilling for me. When I work with a team, when I have people in a workshop, and then I hear later about how they did something and it was because of something that we said or did, or I shared in a workshop, a planning session and coaching conversation, that makes me feel the best, right? So the motivation behind the purpose is often expressed by the people you love in your eulogy. It's what you most want, not without who knows what they'll say, right? So it's up to you to fulfill that purpose. But that is the emotional driver behind everything. The way you work, the way you show up in your family, the way you show up in your communities, in your neighborhood, et cetera. So that's your motivation. It's the emotional center of things, the thing that you feel really strongly about. Very often when I tell people about that in a public setting or whatever for the first time, I'm very emotional as I say it. Not so much today, but that is the center of it, right?

Power: the work that comes easy to you

04:28Bill Gallagher: Next up is Power. What are you actually strong at, right? Think about the things at work, at home, and others that are easy for you, that you throw yourself into, that you're naturally drawn to, that are easy for you, not as easy for other people. That's where your power is at. How do we be doing more of that? Right? So making sense of things, finding the underlying pattern. I'm really good at that. Bringing new ideas to bear, generating a new idea, reframing something, mixing something in a new way. I'm really good at that. Articulating things like turning ideas into words. I'm good at that. Getting started. I'm really good at that. Not everybody's good at that. Taking charge of things. I'm really good at that. Each of these things, these strengths, these power moves have pros and cons, right? They're not without complication, right, for each of them, but there is a place and a way to apply them. If I am working on the thing that is my purpose, that I care about, and I'm doing the kinds of things that I'm naturally good at, that I love doing, right, I'm on the road to something powerful. There's one more thing though, and this is where Play comes in.

Play: the selfish enjoyment you have given up

05:39Bill Gallagher: What do you enjoy doing? Right? So we're going to go into that. Let's go back to Power for a second. So the why, the motivation, you got that. It's the emotional center. It gets you started in the morning. You feel good about it. It's when you look back at your work, those moments, what do you feel best about? How do you want to be remembered? The quickest way to do that is to think about the people you love and what do you want said about you after a long and successful life. Now we will focus on the power. It's also useful to think about what drains you, what don't you love. So bookkeeping, accounting, regular routine kinds of things. I don't love these things. I hate them. I drag my heels at doing bookkeeping, regular consistent like operations. They need doing by somebody, just not me. So think about the things that you love doing. Think about the things that you hate doing or loathe doing, love and loathe. Think about where your strengths come from. If you've ever done strengths tests or other kinds of assessments, personal assessments, psychological assessments, what does it say about you? Right? We want to do more of the things that we're naturally good at and are drawn to and less of the other things. So I want to operate consistent with my motivation. Now I want to do more of those things and less of the others. Right now I'm getting both of those things going in my work, in my home, like all parts of my life. Now I want to add in the one more thing, and that is Play.

07:09Bill Gallagher: So Play is enjoyment, hedonism. What do you like, it's selfish, not selfless. Purpose is, and the fulfillment side of it, the emotional center is, almost universally selfless. It's a contribution to the universe. The Play is much more selfish. Now you could play with other people, you could do that. So what do you love doing? What did you love doing that you've given up that you haven't done? I had this recently and I spent time surfing again. I learned to surf when I was very, very young, like, I don't know, five, six years old. And I have surfed on and on through my life, but big periods of time where I didn't surf. Now I found a new kind of thing called wing foil surfing. So this is a surfboard, but with a hydrofoil.

08:00Bill Gallagher: thing down in the water that lifts you up, and a handheld wing that you ride. Maybe you're familiar with it. Maybe you've seen it. It came after kiteboarding, but it adds some… super enjoyable. I'm not awesome at it. I'm competent. I ride out in the San Francisco Bay, in front of the Golden Gate Bridge and around there and other parts. I travel sometimes. Surfing, sailing, big boat sailing, small boat sailing, catamarans, dinghies, big boats. Like wherever. Tropical, San Francisco Bay, warm, cold. Like all of it. I love all these things. I love music. Oh my God, I love music. I play music when I'm working, getting started in the middle of my day for my clients, in my workshops, on stage, like wherever. I love music. I love dance. I have a tattoo of a dancer on my ankle, right? I'm really passionate about my music and dance and things like that.

08:59Bill Gallagher: What do you love? Right underneath my desk here is a skateboard. I don't ride it outside enough, but I balance on it when I'm using the standing desk, when I rise the desk up. And I'll stand and I'll balance on it. And every now and then I'll take it outside. But movement and outdoors are really important to me. In the winter, I ski a little bit. I don't love it nearly as much as I love the water, summer outdoor sports, but I do really love… I love getting out there and moving and gliding through the snow and the beautiful views and things like that.

09:32Bill Gallagher: Now think about this. What if I'm helping people? I'm being a contribution in some way. I'm using my thinking, my ideating, my coaching, my getting started. I'm using all those kinds of things like that. So I'm making contribution. I'm playing with the things I'm not, and not the things I really hate. And I'm doing it while surfing and sailing, or before or after that kind of thing. I have a mix of those kinds of things. Oh, I'm just like… I feel great. I could be really, really busy, but if I have all those things going together, I feel fantastic, right?

All three elements working together

10:08Bill Gallagher: So fill your calendar up as much or as not. But if you balance all those kinds of things, if you're doing things that fulfill your life purpose and you're playing to your strengths, you're working on the things that you are suited to do, that you're drawn to naturally, and there's some enjoyment, there's some selfish fun and play and that kind of thing. That's your best life. That is how to be living your best life and have an exceptionally full life, if that's what you want.

10:37Bill Gallagher: Or look, if you're operating with your power and your purpose and you're getting a little play in there, you don't even have to do that much, right? You'll notice that. We'll talk about that in another one of these videos. But how do we be the most effective and most fulfilled? However busy you are, not busy… I'm in favor of being a little bit less busy, but just being really filled up. But I noticed sometimes I might visit 15 cities in three months, right? And people look at me and talk to me and they're like, "That's insane, Bill. How do you do that?" And I'm like, "Well, look, if I'm doing the things I love and it's fulfilling for me and I'm playing to my strengths and using those things and not the things that I hate, and there's a little bit of play in between… Oh, I get to surf before I give a workshop in Hawaii or in Southern California, or I get to go take a team sailing or a group of CEOs on the San Francisco Bay. We listen to some great music. I have some good dinner." Like if I add those kinds of… then 15, 18 cities, not a problem for me, right? I could be really, really full, but feel fantastic when I get three things working together.

11:47Bill Gallagher: So this is kind of related to the Japanese concept of the ikigai. And they don't all have to be simultaneously, right? I don't have to coach CEOs while sailing and avoid… Like they could be loosely connected. We want to touch all of them and have them be really present in your life all the time.

12:05Bill Gallagher: But so my questions for you are: What do you want said about you at the end of your life? What do you want said about you today, right here and now? What are you proudest of? What are the moments you're proudest of? And what was it about you in those moments that made you really proud? Right? Not the outcome necessarily, but who you were. When are you proudest of yourself? And what would you want your kids, your spouse, your mom, your grandmother, your dad… like, what would you want them to say about you, or to be able to tell them about who you are? Right? And then what do you actually love doing and what do you hate doing? And what are the things that you enjoy? And is anything missing from your life? Like there was a time where there wasn't nearly enough music in my life. There was a time when I wasn't getting enough surfing and sailing and things like that and skiing and good food and travel. And there are times when some of those things have been missing, right?

12:58Bill Gallagher: So what are those three things? Your purpose, your power, and your play. And are they really actively present all the time in your life? That's what I'm interested in. I hope you can use that, play with that, ponder those three things, get them, write them on the wall in front of you, see what you could do with that. And send me a note, drop me a note, comment here. What is it for you? What are you noticing for yourself? Is anything missing that you'd like to bring back into your life that would make a difference for you?

13:30Bill Gallagher: So there's my invitation. Get in touch with your purpose, power, and play. Bring them to life in your own day-to-day life, week in, week out. Get them there all the time and see what happens for you. See how much more enjoyable… what your capacity is when you have all that. Hope that's been helpful. We'll talk to you again soon. Until next time, keep scaling.

13:53Bill Gallagher: Thanks for listening today. One last thing. If anything in this episode hit home, my book digs into it further. Busy Is Broken: Do Less, Scale More. It's all about how to stop drowning in work and build a business and a team that scales without you. Available right now with content samples at busyisbroken.com. Go grab it. Be less busy.